I A M  for both

Why do so many relationships lack great intimacy?                 

 

1 minute read

The short answer is men and women are different in too many ways to be truly intimate without work.

Lonely Island analogy:

 

Think of women as the "mainland" and men as the "island" just off the coast. An Island not too far for a ferry and just close enough for a bridge.  The mainland much like women possesses all the goods and services to fully function without any support from the island.  However, the island much like men depends on the mainland for much of its goods and services.

 

The island, therefore, needs to bridge the gap in this example with a bridge.  For the Intimacy to grow and the connection between the mainland and the island it's far more dependent on the island doing the work.  The mainland can and often does survive with very little support if any from the island. The kicker is the mainland wants the island to be all that it can be and be joined together with a solid well built lasting bridge. What defines the mainland is the connection to the island. Without islands, it wouldn't be the mainland, just land.  This well built lasting bridge is Intimacy!

So men who see this bridge as an insurmountable obstacle are going to suffer indefinitely. Men who think they are expert bridge builders because they posses a large pile driver will suffer the same demise. It's men who don't get overwhelmed with the entire bridge project who can break it down into its parts and execute the building that will truly bridge the gap to the mainland. 

 

This goes especially for the mainland ages 35-60 years old. If the waters have been turbulent and eroded her shores over decades of poor island bridge builders the odds go even further down of closing this gap.

So don't be a lazy islander! Lazy is always going to equal lonely.  I know it's easier to buy a boat then build a complex bridge but that is not what intimacy truly is.  It can't be bought, it can't be substituted with other lesser forms.  There is no such thing as half intimacy and never a bridge built that didn't connect permanently two things. There are no half-bridges.

Take time. Look at the plans I've laid out for your here. Study them. Ask questions. Do the work. Be assertive and build that bridge she wants you to.

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